What you seek, is seeking you- Rumi

 


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After 10 weeks in a boot, some physical therapy and a swollen hand in a splint for another 3 weeks,  my time in black boots and casts has officially come to a close.

This is a little behind because with a hand injury, washing my right arm was a task, let alone typing.  Who knew you needed your pinky’s for so many keys when typing?  Seriously.  In fact, who knew you rely upon your non dominant hand as heavily and as often as you actually do? I guess this all falls under the theme of: You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.

Interestingly enough, each of my injuries were simply manifestations from my life in its entirety.  I was having issues moving forward in life because I felt the very opposite.  I felt held back and repressed from doing anything I thought I might be good at, afraid of pushing for something unknown, but I also felt completely stuck.  (Ah, leg injury). Well that boot was a part of my life for far too long, I eventually got the hint.  My hand had everything to do with the aftermath of my emotional madness.

Breathing life back in to myself after separating from my (ex)husband (and most recently, divorce) and regaining strength in those areas of my life  I thought I had lost, have all been such significant pieces of the rebuilding process.  I know time and love will be all that’s needed in order to heal, and I’m in that place where I would change nothing.  Literally, Nothing.  I am here to live fully and love whole heartedly, no regrets, not seeking answers, just pure surrender and trust that God will be there to hold me up.  Undoubtedly, he has.  He has provided me all of his best of the best Earth Angels to surround me and hold me in a safe space during this time and here I am;  Full, alive, happy and lighter than I have felt in such a long time.

Life is good, life is really, really good- this is in no way an over exaggeration and I am indebted to those angels mentioned above, but also know, this decision was mutual.  Although I have never experienced such a feeling of brokenness, of heaviness, I have, at the same time, never felt so whole, so complete, all the things I feel today.  Everything with time.  Kasey and I didn’t end anything on bad terms, there was no big ah-ha!  We ended with humble hearts, respect, kindness and a lot of love towards one another.   I suppose if you are going to experience something so life altering, doing so together with dignity is my preferred method of an ending.  Why should I be angry when my path has ultimately lead me here?  This is where I am supposed to be, I’m certain of it.  I am grateful for him as much as I am for anyone and everyone else who has been a part of my journey.  I am filled with gratitude.image

Everything is temporary, Never stop seeking fire.

“It’s hard to believe that it’s wrong to want more than the truest of blue and a love like a roar, I will run to wherever I want to go… ” -New Constellations/Ryn Weaver

tHank you for your love, your support, and for reading.  All of my love and with so much gratitude, always…🙏🏼🙌🏼❤️

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Pictured above was the night I went to the hospital for my hand, combined with the morning after brunch with my Kylie.  She and her husband, Ryan have been everything to me throughout this process.  I was In a state of bewilderment and complete defeat… This collage of photos .. Up until this point, represents the most exhausting, most broken, most unbelievable days in this history of my life.  I tried to record everything I could in real time because in general my life is usually sitting pretty, somewhere at a high between 8-10 on a scale of -50 to 10. So I found myself enjoying those real shitty moments more so than I thought I could ever.  I knew when I came back I would be more grateful tHan I ever could have imagined.  The amount of pain I was in physically, emotionally and mentally were completely blowing my mind.  So documented,  these days were.  And today I am at a level 15 on that same scale.  I am just so in awe of life, I am so in love with life.

As it states above: “be open to it being way better than you could have ever imagined.” And so it is. 🙏🏼

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Travel, it makes you rich.


travel everywhere

What I learned on this trip:

 

Travel while you are young.

This trip was in thanks to my grandma. A bucket list item she chose to share with the women in her family.

We had a blast; I was in a boot, she was in a wheel chair and together we got priority boarding and front of the line … well, Everywhere. NEXT STOP DISNEY!

I loved every bit of this vacation, but I know grandma was frustrated a lot during our trip and as much as we assured her she was not an inconvenience, you could still see the disappointment in her eyes at time. I got a great workout pushing her around so I was thankful for it all. I am grateful I had this opportunity when I did.  31 has been a terrific year!

Enjoy everything, worry about money later: I’m all about living life in the moment. I spent most of my money on food (and medicine) and a couple gifts while I was away. I didn’t drink any alcohol and I really didn’t go too spend happy on food, it was just pricey. I kept asking myself though; how often am I here? This happened to be my first time, and if I’m lucky, not my last.  I heard about this whole “invest for the future,” stuff, but I’m over here all hippy-like-“the futures never promised! Let’s sell everything and travel everywhere. Money- eh! Who needs it?!” And! Double Chase Points!

Family:

I love my family, but when the going gets tough, you just love each other. The main point of this bit, is this was the best trip and I’m happy I got to experience it with them. How often do 3 generations within one family get to travel together? On top of that, if you make it out alive, how often does that trip still manage to rank number one on your lists of trips you’ve ever taken in your entire life? This one did. You choose your friends, not your family; I’m lucky to have them.

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Food:

The food in New Zealand and Australia was freaking amazing. I was warned that it was “eh.” And gluten free and vegetarian options were sparse to none. I will tell you, every restaurant or cafe we ate at, there were gluten free items and vegetarian options available and the food was IN.CRED.I.BLE…. Unless you’re looking for ketchup (it’s disgusting and the only thing that even sort of resembles ketchup is the color of it). I mean really.  Gratuity and tax are already included, so when you find yourself buying a burger for $25AUS, you are really buying a burger for a solid $25AUS, nothing more, but nothing less- it’s expensive. The dessert is also to die for. Everywhere.

People:

Their pallet has been poisoned when it comes to Americans. I was pleasantly surprised over and over again when I was asked if I was Canadian. I asked them what it was I had said for them to ask and their response was always; “well I thought you were Australian at first sight, but when you spoke I assumed you had to be Canadian, because Americans aren’t that nice.” Way to go, Canadians! Thank you for giving us a good name.

They also believe we are crazy for considering Trump for president.

Their people on the other hand, in both New Zealand and Australia, are the sweetest, most amazingly human beings and they all have these incredibly brilliant accents. I’m in love. Not only are they some of the most naturally beautiful humans, but they are just as wonderful on the inside.  Who in America walks up to a total stranger asking how they are doing or if they need help finding anything in particular or who comes back after riding past us (miles past us) on his bike just to offer to take our photo and to pray on my boot on a bridge in Sydney?  I can’t say enough about the Aussies and the Kiwis we encountered during our two weeks abroad, they just crawled in to my heart and that’s where they shall stay.

Hospitality and the Golden Rule:

Our society has a bad rap because we don’t show concern for others like countries abroad do.  We look out for our people in our circles, but we keep to that.  We go about our business, we keep to ourselves on the daily, our garage doors are kept closed. We don’t connect with our neighbors as our society once had. We have seen a lot of change and the world has noticed it. Every time I travel abroad I try really hard to understand their culture, ask questions and be as nice as I possibly can to the people I come in to contact with.  I already feel like the odds are stacked against me just because I am American. So one person at a time we can start to offer them their own experience, allowing them to create their own opinion, not one based off the TV shows they see or the presidential elections we provide.  Side note, the Bachelor is not available in New Zealand… You can’t even pull it up on the Internet. Australia has their own version, I think it’s really called “the Australian Bachelor.”  They have some fun shows.

Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you. The people in these two countries (and every other country I have had the pleasure of visiting) just absolutely blew my mind. They live the golden rule daily, they practice on both people they know and strangers alike. Imagine what life would be like if everyone put forth that level of care and giving mentality.. I am daydreaming about the day I get to go back and experience all of that amazingness again.

Airports:

Their systems are seamless. You walk in to their airports (both countries) and lines simply don’t exist. You get right in!  They are so happy to accommodate you. Remember when flight attendants living the airline lifestyle were considered glamorous and it was a highly sought after career choice? It is that same exact feeling in Australia and New Zealand today. They are always smiling, their uniforms are adorable and neat, they are extra happy to assist passengers on board, they greet you happily and anything they can do to make your flight better, they are on it. They offer Tim Tams and Cookie Time cookies on their flights. Never once did I feel disgusting while flying either Virgin Australia or Air New Zealand. I never felt that immediate urge to shower once I stepped off the plane. I’ll tell you what though, once we arrived in LAX after sitting on a Delta flight for 13 hours, I couldn’t have been more ready for a shower, I sat for 12 hours on Air New Zealand and the feeling was not the same.  There is such a difference. America is so quantity driven, where both Australia and New Zealand are quality, hospitality and efficiency focused.

Live in the moment:

Soak it up. I didn’t eat ice cream while I was away and I tried to avoid dairy throughout the entirety of our trip, but aside from that I was just basking in the glory of what was. If I died tomorrow, I would die the happiest and most fulfilled that I have ever been. The sunshine, the rain, the green, the blue, the palm trees, the hospitality, everything was beyond anything I had ever experienced as a whole and I tried to absorb every moment that I was in, every trip from one buffet to the other, on a rocky ship, Every cookie consumed, every dinner eaten, every snorkel snorkeled, every road trip on the wrong side of the road driven. The beauty, the fresh air, and the delight everywhere, I just cannot put in to words my love for these two countries. It blew my mind.

New Zealand Vs. Australia:

Don’t compare them; don’t disregard one over the other, go visit both countries. I have been told so many times; “Well, we were told not to bother with Australia and so we spent our entire trip in New Zealand. It was beautiful.” Painful.  I just went along with it because I didn’t know any better, but here’s a tip; New Zealand is just a 3.5 hour plane ride away, how often are you that close to Australia? New Zealand is absolutely the most beautiful country I have ever stepped foot in, and I saw a small fraction of it, but I felt that way until I stepped foot in Australia. They were equally as amazing, the people, the beauty, the cities. They were so different, but I fell in love with both of them for different reasons. The big cities and breathtaking beaches of Australia, the hidden valleys and lakes of New Zealand, the blue water and the most beautiful people with accents you will ever will melt your heart in a second of both. If you haven’t considered visiting, you have to bump it up on your list.  If you ask me what my favorite pieces of our trip was, I couldn’t tell you because I loved every bit of every moment for different reasons. The sea life, the Great Barrier Reef, the Australian Rain Forest, the history, the beaches, the food, the mountains and hidden, bright blue freshwater lakes, wild deer, giant pigs and sheep, it was all worth it. My only regret was not taking an extra 2 months to experience the rest of both countries and then flying to Fiji and Bora Bora to experience those beautiful Islands too.

 

My sister wanted to add her own bit of advice to this sweet piece so here it is:

The Cookie Time Cookies are based out of New Zealand… they are quite nice, and very popular. Try them!  It’s their claim to fame. The men had beautiful man buns, smiles, and bodies. BODY.

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Maintaining my weight south of the equator..

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This was the most incredible trip I’ve ever been on.  I can’t even describe my love for these countries.  Maybe that’s why My body adapted so well.

But I changed a few things up in my workout routine while I was on this trip.  So here we go: how I didn’t get fat.  Is that PC?

I have this unhealthy fear of losing all hard work and effort I have put in to myself while on vacation. It usually happens because as I’ve mentioned in previous posts, those of us with PCOS are blessed w a body that loses muscle faster than those living life  without it.

I’m living proof.  Here’s what I did differently this trip.

I usually, when on vacation, focus solely on cardio, A lot of cardio, because it’s free.  Take for example, Ireland.  Last fall my best friend, my best brother in law (her husband), my husband and I flew to Amsterdam and Ireland, loved both countries and ran our little hearts out while we were there.  We trained and ended that trip with a half marathon. It was beautiful.   I lost weight on that trip, Cool, But I also lost muscle mass.

On this incredible trip to Australia and New Zealand; I was sick week one. So all I did was try to survive.  Working out was not going to happen anyway, and I knew better.
Week 2 I was held hostage on a cruise ship for 7 nights and 7 full days.  I hated that, so don’t invite me on a cruise. But on that 20 year old ship was an equally as old fitness room.
It had weights and crappy cardio equipment and I have a stress fracture so the only cardio I was doing was on a Crappy bike, and for you cruisers + fitness freaks.. You know any cardio on a rough sea is a terrible idea. So I limited cardio to 15-25 minutes a day. That’s it. I shifted my focus to weight training. By weight training I mean free weights.  Screw the weight machines. I wasn’t about to attempt any of the older equipment that squeaked every time it moved.

I did more weighted squats this trip, but let me tell you. My butt loved it.  Lunges were out of the question because even with well practiced balance. I was not willing to blow out a knee because I wanted to work my legs at different times Just to hit a wave and fall over. — so I tested this theory.. And I stopped lunging from then on.  I took a 65 pound dumbbell and used it for sumo squats, regular squats and in between sets I grabbed 20-35 lb Dumbbells and did 12-15 reps of bicep curls, triceps presses, flys, reverse flys, rows and weighted ab exercises this all sounds like a duh. But usually I only have access to my body weight when on vacation and that just doesn’t work for me.

So I worked on my abs and lifted as heavily as I could from anywhere around 30-45 minutes a day for 6 of those 7 days.

And it worked like a charm.  Don’t lift 8 lb Dumbbells,  lift 12-15 pounds. Less reps and work up.

This saved me. And then I came home and tried to recover.  And I have worked out a total of 3 times in a full week.  I can’t seem to pull it together, but my body is trying really hard to help me hang in there.  I am more impressed and surprised by the break in postpartum, post vacay weight gain that I have had from this trip. Great Job body, I’m sure it’s only because you’re as confused as I feel.  Maybe that’s the secret.

In one week I have experienced vertigo, infection, nausea, headaches, blurred vision, not enough sleep because the time difference is so insane it’s not even worth discussing. Here’s a clue: I’m writing this at 3:45AM if that gives you any idea.  My period is 3 days off, (don’t worry/ it showed up. I’m not pregnant. But if I were! It would be the sexiest baby of all, because it’s father would have to be from New Zealand.  Chill out, you now know too much.) I can only imagine the affect on the rest of my body this trip has had if all of that is this jacked.

In addition to weight training, I also ate everything and anything I wanted, including: 2-3 sour dough balls a night.  (Fun fact: if you are diabetic, sourdough bread does not spike your blood sugar like other breads-so eat this.) sometimes 2 entrees for dinner, most nights 3 desserts.  Don’t judge me.  Go big or go home.

My spending was out of control because everything is a billion dollars. AND!!! our dollar is stronger! .. (doesn’t freaking matter when a burger is literally $25AUS).

Anyway. THIS was by far the best trip, the water was the bluest of blue, the people were shaken out of a model magazine and the food was brilliant.  I can’t wait to move there.  They love animals and they too think Trump as President is the biggest joke known to man.

So while I sit here watching the room spin, why does anyone drink? This is why I don’t drink and I’m still experiencing it.

Anyway. I’m rambling Bc I’m tired and drunk.

But here is a workout routine and my digestive help routine:::

Cardio:  I rode the bike for 15-25 minutes

I attempted walking up a hill on a treadmill, but the waves forced me to lose balance and nearly fall.

either way!

15 Sumo Squats with 65 pound dumbbell (this was the heaviest they offered).  Feet are wider than hip width distance a part, toes pointed outward, heels in, hold dumbbell from the top of it squat keeping your knees tracking over your ankels, chest held high.

12-15 Bicep Curls:  I used a 20 pound dumbbell for 15 reps, 25 pounds for 10-12 reps.

Tricep Press:  I took a 35 pound dumbbell, laying on my back on a bench keeping elbows stationary dropping weight behind my head towards floor, pressing it back toward the sky.

Repeat these three exercises for 3 sets.

 

15 Regular weighted squats (keeping feet hip width distance, feet parallel) holding 65 pound dumbbell.

12-15 rows:  Using a 35 pound weight, one knee on the bench, coordinating hand holds top of bench.  pull weight up, keeping core strong, squeeze shoulder blades together as you row.

40 Mason Twists: there are a billion names for this particular exercise:  Balancing on the floor or end of bench, feet stay lifted (modification, heels rest lightly on the floor) holding one dumbbell at your chest, rotate your torso to the right elbow reaches toward the floor, repeat other side.

Repeat these for three sets.

Simple, short and sweet and you’ve all seen them before, but this is what I did.  I liked it.

Other super secret winners:

I use digestive enzymes.  In particular I use Terazymes from doterra.  They have literally saved me. I eat two with every meal.

Digest-zen essential oils,  I put 3-5 drops on my belly every night and rub it in clockwise.  I do this on vacay and at home.

 

then I ate a lot.

 

Thank you for reading and for your support and for allowing me to blab your ear off.  I appreciate you all more than you will ever know.  Put Australia and New Zealand at the top of your bucket list.  I can’t wait to move here 🙂

imageLake Tekapo- crappy pic only Bc u can’t see the blue in the lake—see below 😍imageimage

Auntie and I:: dreams do come true. Sydney Opera House, dinner cruise through Sydney and Darling HArborimage

Bondi Beach and Icebergs Beach Club. This has been on my own bucket list since forever so my giddiness exceeded that of a 7 year old going to Disney.

imageCairnes, Queensland Australia.  The Oldest Rainforest.  Beauty. imageimageSelfie in the tiniest room of ever. #cruiseimage

Akoroa, NZ.  On our Hector Dolphin Cruise. I focused on the beauty of this water, George and Hector in hopes of not vomiting.

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Sydney, AUS Darling Harbor=happy placeimage

Still at port in Brisbane.  Get on board. Hit buffet. Take selfie. Move in to smallest room you can for a week. Love.  Cousin love ❤️

Blogging Lag, Jet Lag and a Boot to recovery.

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I am a millennial/ gen Y: I am a yoga instructor :: which means I support naps, unemployment and Doritos. Just somewhere along the line, out of poor eating habits and crappy genetics I ended up with PCOS, which forced me before even being diagnosed, to make the conscious decision to give up fast food and soda in the 10th grade. Exercise was always a way of life so when I gave up sports I realized the heavy reliability my body had on it to stay in shape.. And “looking” healthy. I’ve never bounced back fully. Should I regret giving up sports while watching as my body lost all muscle in a matter of just a couple of months? Or be grateful it happened so I could wake up and make some good decisions. Either way no regrets, frustrations, YES, regrets, nah.

So I traveled to Australia and New Zealand earlier this month. It was the best thing. It was the best two weeks of my life. No really.. I have never fallen in love with two countries, let alone one, and all of their people in all of my life in a shorter period of time, than I did in those two weeks.

I left the United States in a boot from a stress fx and pushing granny in a wheel chair down a jet way from PHX-LAX-AUK

Anyway. Upon my return home from these incredible two weeks of life, I ended up not only depressed, but physically a hot hot mess. I have never experienced jet lag to this degree. Ever. And I’m talking even post Hong Kong. Here I am entering week 2 of some of the most difficult recovery days of my life. I’ve had an easy life, but I’m comparing this to a month out of school due to a severe kidney infection, I’m talking a Pulminary emboli shower, and then this. Jet lag. Vertigo. Nausea. Headaches. Blurred Vision. The only thing keeping the other two in the running is that I haven’t thrown up yet.

So scientifically speaking, ha! Right. Ok, Kileys deep thoughts: let’s talk Coriolis Effect… I’m not a scientist, but I’ll bet somewhere on the internet I could find a fictional or non fictional article to back my theory here.. So hang tight.

There is controversy on the theory of toilets or sinks to spin or flush or drain in the opposite direction in the Southern Hemisphere vs northern hemisphere.

The theory is is that there is not enough mass or area to cause this to happen in these appliances. Ok whatever. To be honest I never found a toilet that didn’t just force The water straight down. I never found a toilet similar to the ones we have here in the states at all, so I couldn’t actually test this theory. On the other hand. I spent a week at sea, on a cruise ship. The sea is much larger in size when compared to a sink or bathtub. And I slept on it for 7 nights. These large body masses is where the Coriolis Effect happens right?

We then proceeded to fly through 11 time zones back to the United States. I haven’t been the same since and I have family members who have experienced the same thing. So! My theory is not a theory at all, but just chilling in the Southern Hemisphere in a great body of water. Cyclones spin a different way here. Why can’t this jack my brain up and the way my body functions? I think it can. I’ll keep that as is because It’s an opinion or theory. But it’s a struggle and I want to vomit a lot. I just haven’t. Just crossing the equator a couple of times and sleeping in a giant puddle of rocky waters seems to me like I am in the wrong line of business.

It’s science. You’re welcome.

And here is some info on the Coriolis Effect

http://abyss.uoregon.edu/~js/glossary/coriolis_effect.html

im-sorry-all-this-jetlag-from-my-european-vacation-is-making-me-feel-superior-to-you-1baca

Monkeys and Sugar and everything innovative.

          37204-You-Are-Worth-It

Hello Month 2 of the year 2016! And happy Chinese New Year! It is the Year of the Monkey!

 

For those of you who know me, know that I have a slightly unhealthy obsession with the Asian Culture, and for those of you who don’t know me, well. There’s a fun fact J. The year of the monkey is the year for entrepreneurs, for small business owners and for those wanting to venture out on their own. It is the year for the innovator, the creator, for the traveler, for the people who seek to create their own path. This is the year to do what you have been waiting for. Monkey years are known to be positive, but prepare yourself for change. It will be an amazing year. For those of you who enjoy structure, this may be a bit of a challenge, but challenge, change, it’s all-good for us. To make it even better, the year 2016, the year of the monkey will be intensified by the fire element associated with it. I hope you enjoy roller-coasters, because I do. HANDS UP!

monkey

So if you are stressing out about the new year beginning 5 and a half weeks ago and your goals have yet to take off, well! You’re in luck! We can start a new, this week with the celebration of the Chinese New Year.  I often think about this;  Am I doing everything I can be doing to better myself, to excel in what I currently do or propel myself toward something I would eventually like to be doing? The answer is usually, EH. Sort of.

I have a lot of big dreams and with each of those come a lot of fear. But really, Who doesn’t have a fear of something? Who is not afraid of failure? Better yet, who isn’t afraid of success? I like my couch. I’m terrified!

Without creating overwhelming decisions or setting goals :: “I must lose 100 pounds by March.”  Instead Create small habits, good habits. Change old habits.

I am officially a week in to this “no sugar” kick. My Sheree said she was just over eating sugar, she mentioned this around the same night my body decided it was going to keel over if I didn’t get rid of it too. So! Together we kicked it. Poor TIMING!! Because, Superbowl Sunday happened this past weekend incise you were unaware. To say the very least, my will power has been tested over and over and over again. We allowed ourselves to splurge on fruit, Go Broncos.

sugar

This was decision number one to a happier body. This wasn’t a decision made based on physical appearance, it was a decision made based on the functionality of my body. Our bodies do not easily digest sugar, it’s refined, it’s unnatural, it’s a great way to fill your body with empty calories.

My first two nights of this no sugar cleanse, I had dreamt about binge eating cookies. Two consecutive nights. This is a serious red flag and if anyone tells you sugar is not addictive, well, don’t listen, they are completely wrong. Let’s back up and review, I was legitimately binge eating in my dreams. I verbalized to whomever I was with, “I know I’m supposed to avoid sugar, BUT TOMORROW! I will start! Tomorrow!!” And I stuffed cookie after cookie after cookie in to my face hole. I woke up in a slight panic thinking I can’t believe not even one day in, I quit on myself. I gave up on me for the good of my taste buds. My taste buds don’t wake me up nor do they motivate me to work out.. They get me off the couch in order to grab more cookies and that’s where their help ends.

Why did I delete sugar (aside from obvious reasons)? First it was becoming an issue for me. I craved it after every meal. I was baking cookies on the daily, -no exaggeration here.  On a deeper level, sugar creates a spike in blood sugar, and because women with PCOS or poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome, are typically insulin resistant it also creates a spike in insulin, our bodies are unable to process it. Creating additional issues such as high blood pressure and higher levels of triglycerides and so on and so forth, all of which has been linked to heart disease. Added sugar, according to the American Heart Association, should be limited to 100 calories or 25 grams per day for women and 150 calories or 37 grams of sugar for men.

http://circ.ahajournals.org/content/120/11/1011

 

You should just click on this link. I’m crazy about MindBodyGreen as of late, and this is the perfect little tid-bit of information regarding the fun facts of our friend, Sugar. I love you sugar, you taste amazing, but you are terrible for me. Farewell.

 

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4543/14-MindBlowing-Facts-About-Sugar-Infographic.html

 

Check the labels of your groceries and try to avoid anything containing the ingredients of the following:

-Corn Syrup

-Sugar (glucose, sucrose, dextrose, fructose)

-High Fructose Corn Syrup

-Honey

-Corn Sweetener

-Molasses

-Syrup in general

-Brown Sugar

-Malt Sugar

 

I don’t know a soul who wants to hear a banana is a good substitute for a cookie, including me, but it is. Here are a few suggestions on how to kick your habit, or limit your sugar intake:

First, YES, you can. Proceed…

-Eat every 3-5 hours. In fact since cutting sugar, I have been hungrier more frequently. The hungrier you are the more likely you are to eat processed foods such as breads and sugary delights!

-Whole Fruit- for the super bowl. It was the most depressing day, but it’s getting better. I promise it is. J

-Pack your day full of protein. Eat more protein while avoiding high sugary foods.

-CandiGone: Although this  is in no way a substitute, it will assist in balancing intestinal yeast, and in turn boots sugar cravings. So perhaps bump this to the top of your list.   You can find it at Whole Foods or Sprouts for around $35. It is a 15 day cleanse, and the above substitutions will seem attainable.

 

This is my current goal. For me it is lofty, but the end result will be worth it.

What is it that you are working toward? It can be as small or as massive as you want it to be, just believe in yourself.   You can have whatever you put your mind to.

 

More yoga? 1x? 2-3 days a week?

Work out? 3-4 x a week?

Nutritional or diet goals?

Travel more?

 

Follow through, create a gratitude journal to help you remember the good, the foundation and reasoning you are working on the things you are. Write down your goals and continue to come back to that space. There is a reason it resonated with you, follow through with that. Offer your body something it deserves. Perhaps it’s just forgoing soda. Replace it with water. Create a goal to drink your pounds in ounces of water every day. Do something for yourself now, so your future self will benefit, so your future self will thank you.   Life is short, don’t wait. Do what you do. This is your year. Make it worth it.

 

 

 

Workout:

  1. Drink water

Run one mile. If you can, time this, record your time, and hold on to it.

15 push-ups

15 squats

15 push-ups

15 squats

30 Sit-ups

30 second Right Side plank

30 Second Left Side Plank

1 Minute plank

15 side lunges ®

15 side lunges (L)

15 wide legged squats

15 side lunges ®

15 side lunges (L)

15 wide legged squats

1 Mile Run, Try to meet or beat your first mile time.

 

Yes, yes, you can.

 

YOU are worth it.

 

Mooooooooooooo!

if life gives you lemons dyslexicHI HI!!
Hello there! Here we are 3 weeks into the new year, we have started accomplishing our goals and working toward our intentions we set for ourselves just a short 26 days ago… ya?! Or maybe we are stuck in a rut, blaming ourselves for being lazy failures and choosing the couch over a treadmill or what not and so forth and so on.

Forget it. Today is a new day, we start TODAY.

I ate dairy yesterday. I blame the cardinals for my binge, but I had a couple of bites of bri cheese. Just a little bit. My head became a hot stuffy mess and that was the end. First of all. Disappointment. I love cheese. Yes, I stay away from it, but when I want just a little taste of it, I feel like I should be able to have just a little taste of it! Second of all it’s been a long while so it always surprises me when I have some and my bodies reaction is so crazy.

On the bright side! I found dairy free, gluten free cookie dough and not only JUST as dough, but as cookies, they taste like what I assume Heaven will serve when I arrive. (That’s me putting out positive vibes as though Heaven will accept me and such and such and such). Anyway. I’d love to share the brand with you, butttttt they already sell out like crazy and I’m not willing to part with them just yet (this is where hell starts to loom over me).

So dairy has my throat scratchy and my head stuffy like I’m coming down with a cold. Give it a day and it starts to remove itself from my system and voila. THINGS I KNOW.

Other things I know about dairy:
It screws with my hormones. Yea. PCOS. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrom. It’s a mega hormonal imbalance and dairy is just going to make that rollercoaster a real record breaker.
I would love to go in to detail on this but the science is beyond me. The important thing to know is the hormone found in milk from a cow, Insulin Growth Factor-1, is structured the same as Insulin, and also functions similarly. The problem here is that we (women with PCOS) already have TOO MUCH OF THIS Insulin Growth hormone, and when we add to it we just add to the problems. Mo’ insulin’ mo’ problems. (We are insulin resistant, this causes a lot of issues)
Am I right?

I could go on and on about this, but I would have to really really think really really hard to figure out how to write it all down accurately and my brain and science and math are just in constant cahoots. So you’re going to get the super 1st grade version from me most often.

In addition to this IGF-1, you can also find testosterone, progesterone, prolactin, amongst SO many others in dairy milk. Women with PCOS do NOT need to add any of this to our diets either!!

Growing up we have been told calcium was crucial for stronger and healthier bones. Did you know that exercise is really healthy for bone density and strength too?

If you have PCOS, try removing dairy from your diet, just for at least 21 days and see how you feel when it’s gone.

Instead of dairy milk try ANY of the other alternatives available at most grocery stores:

-Flax seed milk, it’s delicious.
-Coconut milk- I love this, it does NOT taste like coconut water to me, I am not a fan of coconut water.
-Oat Milk- This is NOT gluten free, but it to me tastes like melted ice cream. I adore it.
-Almond Milk- If you have nut allergies, please avoid.
(avoid soy milk, regardless of what they say, it’s really not great for you. If you want soy, go with soy beans etc etc. Soy milk is very processed and can also screw with your hormones.. this is a shout out to people everywhere)

-Butter: Vegan Earth Balance , olive oil or coconut oil based are both really delicious.

Cheese: Daiya. This stuff is creamy and delightful. Sounds wrong, but trust your gut and Go with it. 😉

Dark// Chocolate- ‘Enjoy Life’ brands are great. These are all hypo allergenic like my dogs. It doesn’t shed, no nuts, no dairy, no gluten, no fun, but it IS delicious!

Ice cream: I have a serious obsession with So DELICIOUS brands. Coconut and almond based ice cream products. OH man. This is EXTRA good.

COCO WHIP- since I’m not willing to give you my cookie secret just yet, I’ll give you this one. Coconut whip cream is better than regular whip cream and it makes me want to dance on the regular. Go crazy.

Yes all of this will taste a little differently, but that is only because we are used to eating heavily processed foods. It takes us ABOUT 14 days to remove the crap from our systems, and 21 days for our taste buds to change. So hang with it. Healthier foods do start to taste better and the crap begins to taste like, well, crap.

Chin up! You will feel so much better, and again, you don’t know how good, good feels, until you feel great. Do your body a favor, it will thank you later.

SWEAT ONCE A DAY!

Here is a little exercise boost to increase bone density, just so you aren’t freaking out about not getting your calcium intake from dairy.

Let’s start with:

PLANK: We are starting hereeeeee Only because I completed a 42 minute plank last Wednesday, January 20, 2016 during peak week at Orange Theory fitness. I will never break a bone because of this day in history.

Keep your wrists below your shoulders and reach your heals back like you want them to touch the ground. Your hips will stay low so your spine can stay in perfect alignment from neck to tailbone. If you feel pressure in your low back, release your knees to the floor.

LUNGES:::10 each side.
Alternate. When you step out, take a BIG step so your knee stops directly above your ankle, NOT your toes. Use your heals to press back with, if you choose to use your toes, your knees will take this tension on instead of your glutes. And you need to work your glutes!

PUSH UPS:::20 (break as you need or work your way up to this number as the days go on)
I don’t care if you are on your knees or your toes, keep your hips up, if you feel any pressure in your low back, lift your hips slightly or drop your knees to the ground. No pain, hear me?

Squats::: 20

Please be mindful here, again, our knees really don’t want to deal with all of the work, so use your big butt muscles and work ‘em!
Sink back in to your hips. LADIES!! We are lower body warriors so USE this to your advantage! As if you were to sit back in to a chair .. SINK your butt BACK, not straight down because this is when our knees begin to protrude over our toes, our heals start to lift and our glutes stop working for us. WE GOT GLUTES> USE THEM!. So if you must, lift your toes so your heals have to dig in.

Repeat these few exercises 3 times. If you want more.. ADD PLYO. Yes!

Jump alternating lunges
Power push ups (clap between each or just press yourself off of the ground an inch or so and catch yourself with soft elbows-Never ever please please please, land (hands or feet) with locked joints.. knees stay slightly or deeply bent, same with your elbows.
Jump Squats.

And then! Take some yoga.

You can find free videos on youtube, or you can subscribe to some yoga channels. Or please, be my guest and come take a class ☺
And I love hugs, I think that’s also good for your bones, and your heart.

Happy January 26!

Get it!
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This is my Lifetime Yoga Squad. I’m lucky to have them <3

2016.

invest in your life

Getting back on the bandwagon I’m taking my focus back to my health goals for the year. I ended 2015 with what seems to be the beginning of shin splints and plantar-fasciitis. The problem here is that I have neglected to take care of my own well being in the process of trying to just stay in shape.
If you aren’t making an investment in yourself, you’re letting your entire body down. I’m trying really hard to prevent injury this year. I think I had gotten so used to living pain free, I stopped worrying about what I wore on my feet. Whereas before I would be making sure I’d switch my shoes out every few months, keep my inserts up to date and foam roll on a more regular basis.
The best quote I’ve heard is, “you don’t know how bad you feel until you finally start feeling great.”
(I quote that loosely, but you get the gist.)

In addition to this, a clean diet offers so many benefits: sleep improvement, an increase in energy throughout the day and a mood booster to boot. This is not a coincidence; there is a direct correlation between food and the way you function both physically and mentally, even emotionally. Food is our energy source, when we fuel our body with crap, we don’t function efficiently. It’s like filling your “PREMIUM ONLY” performance vehicle with 87 or lower grade gasoline.. and that’s the nicest analogy I could muster.. because you know my sailor of a mouth wanted to use all sorts of explicative *&^^%$- here. Anyway, you catch my drift.

A few of my goals for the year include cutting processed carbs. I abstain from most gluten products because it really does make me feel just absolutely terrible, but I’m really going to make an effort to avoid corn-based products too.

CORN: a nutrition less grain. (my own definition… and because I am such a wordsmith, this is a delight for me to share with you.) We think corn chips are so much better for us than plain tortilla chips, but I don’t really know that I agree.. I find myself feeling similar to corn based products as I do with gluten full products.

DAIRY: I keep this out of my diet as it is, but when you are sick, try to avoid dairy products as much as possible. It is a phlegmy type substance and in eastern medicine it is studied as a having a direct correlation to symptoms of a head or chest cold and then some.
Alternatives: Dairy free everything. Almond or Coconut flours have been fabulous for me. We use a vegan butter in our household; if butter is needed at all. Olive and Coconut oils are two staples in our house as well and cheese just doesn’t hang out here.
HOWEVER:::: IF you are a cheese lover! There are dairy free options available here too, and they have gotten pretty darn good! Aged cheeses seem to work ok for my system too, if I’m in the mood for splurging anyway.

READ THIS ARTICLE! It’s really interesting.. and I think you’ll like it. ☺
http://www.askmyacupuncturist.com/askmyacupuncturist/Dairy_Foods.html
Also, I have an amazing acupuncturist… I have her info too, she can help with all of this!

Dark Chocolate- this is sneaky. Check the ingredients on the back of your candy bar because a lot of dark chocolate (even the fancy goodness) has milk product in it. You can find vegan chocolate and it is really just as delicious.
Enjoy Life brand is a great alternative. It’s dairy, soy and nut free chocolate. YES PLEASE

PEANUT BUTTER: I’m only adding this in because it has made my life even happier! I developed a nut allergy back in 2013. That was a blast. But I loved peanut butter. Everything peanut butter. So when that was taken away from me my world seemed a bit (dramatic) cloudy. Until my sister discovered and shared with me ‘the sneaky chef!’ It’s peanut butter, but without peanuts and instead made with a sunflower base…. Tastes just like peanut butter! I know there have been plenty of seed butters out there, but this has been by far my favorite. You’re welcome.

Other goals for 2016:

Yoga. As an instructor I have really been slacking in my practice, so making it habit to get on my mat even just 2 classes a week is a new goal for me.
One of those is going to be Sunday yoga at lululemon of Chandler. 10AM. (Check your local lulu store for their free classes).

YOGA RETREATS: This is happening! I put it out there without expecting anything to take flight for a couple of years, but sometimes when you put your dreams out there they manifest themselves in the craziest of ways. Jan and I will be running an 8 day retreat in Ireland THIS SUMMER! For more information on that, you can email us at YogaRetreatYourself@gmail.com and check the link in my website under “SWEAT SCHEDULE!”

Blogging: I have been a super inconsistent blogger, and although one of my best friends (and brilliant writer) tells me blogging is for the privileged person just allowing themselves the ability to talk about themselves (duh), I do really want to help others with … shit.
SO! Although you’ll hear a lot about my personal crap, I’m also going to refocus and bring health and fitness back as my main focus.
PCOS is going to be something I really begin to refocus on as well in my posts, you can look back at my older posts for health history here, or you can stay tuned as we try new products and routines that work for those with similar health goodness. WHY?
A. Because it helps me research and understand what’s going on with my body instead of beating it up for not reacting to the “normal’ recommendations of diet and exercise.
B. I think it is really important to experience, discover and share what works and what doesn’t work for my body with others experiencing the same health hurdles.

So stay tuned for all of this fun stuff! I am SO EXCITED for everything to come this year!

Thank you for following and if there is ever a subject or questions you have on anything, please reach out. I love that stuff.
love yourself

The Girl With Kaleidoscope Eyes

DREAM BIGGER

DREAM BIGGER

Dressed up and ready for our NYE, Meg, Court, Kasey, Sam and I headed out to our 2015 farewell dinner, when everything went … awry. I was with two of my best girlfriends in the universe , my husband, Megs husband, Sam and we were headed out to a night on the frigidly cool Town of my hometown of Traverse City.

Fashionably late we arrived at the Grand Traverse Resort; 7 minutes after our planned reservation time. Rude, I know, but life happens and women have to get dressed or something and put make up on and then we proceeded to stand by and take photos next to the giant Christmas tree adorning the center of the lobby. We then rode the glass elevator to the top floor, we checked our coats and were whisked away to our table. As we waited, we one by one opened our menus only to be greeted with a fixed 4-course meal and a $55++ stamped on the top. What does ++ mean anyway? So it’ll be ABOUT $55? It’s $55-ISH? Mind you, at this moment in time it made perfect sense to me that it was New Years Eve and a fixed menu would make the most sense, however, this was never a topic of discussion when creating the reservation. I, along with everyone else, were a bit shocked. We waited fairly long for our waitress to greet us, and in the meantime we discussed our escape route. The boys went to retrieve our coats as we skidishly awaited their return (that never happened)and then our waitress showed up. A few curve balls later we ended up downstairs at Jack’s Sportsbar. Still dressed up mind you, we joined the crowd of die hard MSU: Go Green! Go White! Fans and proceeded to order greasy bar food and drinks.

At this moment I’m sitting with three of my 29 year old loves, my 38 year old husband and my 31 year old self talking about this thing called life, this crazy, crazy thing we live in every day. I cannot believe we are where we are in life. I cannot believe we are discussing business ventures and babies. This is stuff our parents talked about, these were conversations only ‘old people,’ had. We’ve arrived. Although I definitely don’t consider any of these ages to be ‘old,’ youngER me would beg to differ. Anyway, the conversations and the sports bar was much more our speed, much more our budget, we weren’t dressed for a sports bar, but neither were the bride and groom who were smashed out of their minds starring off in to space. Epic.
We took a moment to relish in it all. Cheers to telling people what we want, to making what we want happen and to not resist what is, but to embrace it. Sometimes you can have the most perfectly planned plan just so it can end completely different. That is perfection.
We headed downtown in our frozen vehicle because it was RULL cold out, we had run out of time for wardrobe change, so we rallied. We ended up at a house party which was also… not a part of the plan, we wanted to see the Cherry Drop downtown, but Kasey, my 38 year old going on 21 year old husband preferred a house party. That’s an entirely different story all together, but the hilarity and stories that came out of it were really something!

We headed back to Charlie’s bachelor pad where we proceeded to freeze to death (our own doing) half of us were slightly intoxicated and the other half were just trying to make it through. We woke up the next day to a winter wonderland. The snow was falling perfectly outside, and with that we decided to walk across the street to the Omlette Shoppe for an early first breakfast of 2016 celebration. We froze, slipped a bit on some hidden ice, said hi to a young high school dude wearing pale blue pants and boat shoes while sitting in his Lexus stuck in a snow bank, realized we were not any help and went on our way. We finished our morning with a trip to the open space, slipped a few more times, snapped a few photos, but it was all so pretty. The quiet of the snow gave us all the space to realize we were probably going to end up with frostbite, but also life is meant to be lived in the moment, to be lived and appreciated when we are fortunate enough to be surrounded by those who love us the most, doing what we want, or maybe what we didn’t know we wanted but ended up there anyway, by spending life in places and spaces and recognizing the importance of simply  just being. It’s about being with our people, but also simply sitting with the peace, love and acceptance of ourselves. We didn’t mean for any of the things that happened to happen, but everything played out exactly as it was meant to and better than we could have ever imagined.

I love happy accidents and I love ending the old year and ringing in the new with the people who matter most me, without resistance to the uncertainty without resistance to change.

This year is going to be a year of change, I can feel it. I’m ready to do more, be more and DREAM BIGGER. Let’s see what you have in store for me 2016, I’m just going to sit back and let you take me where you know I belong.

No set plans, just direction, without resistance only persistence.

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”- Socrates

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I will be blogging more on health and fitness with intermittent shenanigans because I really love shenanigans.
HAPPY 2016! Get your year on!

#ambassadorlove

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Because creativity shouldn’t come from obligation, but from inspiration.

I have had the most brilliant few months, and I have been so overwhelmed (in the best way) with living life, that sharing it with the world in long winded sentences, just never took precedence.

Life is a roller coaster already, but add in some really amazing highs and you’ve got yourself a record shattering roller coaster!

In September one of my number one goals, one I had always been terrified to share with anyone in fear that it wouldn’t come true (completely ridiculous, by the way, if you want something to happen.. put it out there.) well, it came true.

lululemon Chandler surprised me with a scavenger hunt, completed with the most delicious cupcakes, which read “WILL YOU BE OUR AMBASSADOR??” Because this was the very same weekend my entire family was back in Michigan to spread my sweet grandfathers ashes along the shores of his favorite fishing spots, (Yea. You’re welcome. You’re definitely swimming in that.) I was extra emotional. Like not “oh cute, she shed a tear-emotional.” It was much more, ‘Aw crap, that is an ugly cr.. sob. That is an UGLY SOB.’ The mind blowing amount of emotions that bubble up when you accomplish something you want so badly!!!! Is an indescribable feeling and I swear since September 27, my heart has grown 5 times its size.

Every day in between has been just as unbelievable. To break it down and stuff it in to a tiny little nut shell, here is the gist of it: Two of my best friends from high school got married, I got to spend a lot of time with my friends back in the upper Midwest, it was awesome. The most heart wrenching piece of it all was when my sister left her dream job to become full care taker for my grandma. ZERO hesitation, might I add.

Yea, let’s talk about that a little bit. She is my person. Kori is my through it all, loves me until absolutely no end and questions me on every freaking decision I have ever made in my entire life.. from going to go to the bathroom to what I need to eat for dinner (usually corn and mushrooms). She is just the best on every level. I couldn’t ever do what she’s doing and the amount of respect I have for her is outrageous. The amount of envy I have for her is little to none. Selfishly I’m crushed to have her move so far from me, but aside from myself, I could not be any more proud of her. I am so lucky to have her. Wherever she is.

And TODAY! Today was my lululemon ambassador photo shoot. Because I’m still a bit on cloud nine from it all, I felt ridiculously happy and inspired to chit chat about it. I made myself nervous over the fact that there was this big production set up for and around me. That’s a lot of pressure. But what I am most excited about is how I actually went in to this shoot. With little to no expectation of how I was to look or what I was to look like. Typically I would take an hour doing my hair, drying it, curling it, and setting it (whatever that means). Then another hour completing my make up, or paying someone to do it for me (which initially, my amazing make-up artist of a sister was going to be here for that, and I blew it when I caught the flu.) I digress, these little things which would normally have me so stressed out, didn’t affect me even a little bit today. I left my hair natural and curly so it took me 13 seconds to add some oil to it, I face timed my sister for step by step directions on how to make my face look presentable, threw on some clothes and waltzed my way to the Village for an all day event of just yoga, with Tam as my guide, Allan as my photographer and Amy and Crystal as just my incredible super amazing among other synonyms of support I had just one of the best days. Tam, who is the reason for the season.. or photo sesh. I wouldn’t be where I am without her, straight up. She introduced me to yoga when she went through her teacher training, she supported me when I completed my teacher training. I was there when she was asked to be Chandlers very first ambassador and she showed up when I was asked 4 years later. I love little things like that. I love how life works and it’s in those moments, those take always that make life so worth, well, everything. All of the little things, that aren’t even that little. My focus was there. I didn’t worry about how I looked at all during the actual shoot. I wasn’t stressed out about the fact that my hair was it’s natural messy self, or that I couldn’t figure out how to focus my gaze. It literally took me all day to figure out how to accurately practice yoga 😉 . I completely let go, a lot of that had to do with the amazing support I had surrounding me all day, but on a personal note I didn’t beat myself up… too much. I’m not perfect. It is so visually clear to me in every photo that I am not perfect. I could never be a super model, but I can do a few yoga poses. And Aside from that, I absorb confidence from the people who all believe in me regardless of my imperfect perfection. It’s hard to sit there and wish for anything else, Really.

My point is this; life is just really good. There is a lot of crazy in this world and it’s necessary to acknowledge all of that, but it’s also necessary to do our part in enjoying one another, treating one another the way we would like to be treated, building each other up and spending time loving instead of breaking ourselves and others down.

There is always something to be grateful for. Always. Look for that.

And when you wake up every morning, remind yourself, “TODAY, yes TODAY! will be the very best day of my entire life. “

#LOVEON
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Until next time.. which could be soon, might be later, but this is what it is for now. XO Namaste 😉

Once in a Blue Moon.

truetoyourselfAs I sit under this cloudy, moonlit sky.. I’m really overwhelmed. No I mean really. Blue moons happen pretty few and far between (I think they occur something like an average of every 2.7 years or so). This year, this moon is different for me. Mostly because it has been just over 3 years since I started teaching yoga. I suppose I’m just a little more in tuned with myself. Understanding my body, my needs and knowing that No, I’m not perfect. But I’m perfectly OK with being who I am and where I am.

In June I received my Reiki 1 Certification and I have to tell you, it’s been one of my favorite, most rewarding learning experiences I have had.

I decided to lay under the sky tonight and give myself reiki. After completing the first certification it’s encouraged that we offer ourselves reiki every single day for at least the first 30 days following. Tonight has been the most intense. It was interesting because I could feel my entire body pulsating and I kept slipping in and out of this light sleep. When I would open my eyes the clouds seemed to be standing still, Almost as if I was starring at a painting. Usually I am able to focus enough to notice the movement of the sky as each cloud passes in front of the bright moon, but not tonight. Tonight was interesting. Even though every time I did open my eyes, there were different clouds, they never seemed to be going anywhere. It was a different picture every time.

I guess I just decided to take that deeper and think about it, because as a yogini I am supposed to take that to a ‘wah wah’ level and freak everybody else out with it.

Life is change. That is just going to happen. Although there are plenty of times where the word “stuck,” resonates deepest within me, life still moves on, the sky still changes, the clouds slowly sneak by even if seemingly standing still. People, things, tasks, jobs. Whether it be major or minor, there is and will always be change. It is necessary.

So tonight I sit in contemplation. Yep. What seems to be so perfect and pulled together from the outside, and although I feel pretty put together on the inside, I know there is a lot of shit that needs to be worked on. Progress. Always progress. I am just a constant work in progress, and that’s just life. I think we look at life as a series of events; A series of events that have to take place in sequential order. We go to school, we grow up with people we love and who love us back, we graduate high school and go directly to college, we live in a dorm room, we meet more amazing people, we party, we love, we eventually graduate, we get a real job. Hopefully at some point we meet and will eventually marry the man or woman of our dreams and then we will get engaged. Which is a life event posted to our facebook wall announcing to the world that we did it! This is a life goal, set by society, and we have to make sure everyone knows we’ve achieved it in the order in which we were supposed to. And yes, my diamond is one carrot. Thank GOD, I mean right? We plan our wedding via Pinterest (yes. I was married before this gem, so I had to do it pretty old school.) Nevertheless, Facebook found out about it, and HOORAY! We spent too much on a 5 hour event, but I have to say it was one of my favorite days. Immediately after that comes the house, the kids, the dogs, or the house, the dogs, the kids. Or the dogs, the kids, maybe a house. It gets a little messy here these days, but all the same the questions start flooding in. Heaven forbid you tell them you haven’t really thought about kids too much, because traveling seems to take precedence at the moment. Gasp.

2015 is fun. Because I don’t give a shit. And that seems to be #trending HA. No, I don’t work 40 hours a week, a lot of people consider my job to be less than that, maybe more like a hobby. But I like my hobby. Which is probably why it isn’t considered by many as a job. I work maybe 13 hours a week, I love on my animals, I have time to workout and care for myself, I have time and energy to give to others, and over all I feel I have a pretty solid balance happening. I feel like I was made for this. Kids, eh, I’ve been advised against it, I’ve also been told I can’t actually have children, but in the end, if it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, I travel and continue on with my hobbies, I continue on with life, because if I don’t, it will continue on without me.

I’ve heard more recently a lot of people exclaiming, “I don’t know what I’m doing with my life.” Or “I feel like life is passing me by and I haven’t done the things I’ve wanted to do.” It’s not too late, just do it already. Thankfully and with gratitude times a billion, I feel like I have been fortunate enough to do a lot of the things if not most all of the things that I have wanted to accomplish. Which really freaks me out because typically that means the end for my life is drawing near. On the other hand I feel I have a lot more to offer and a lot of other lives to reach and meet and love. So yes. This full moon signifies change, although the sky seems to be standing still. It’s caused this rant and ramble of a blog post, but change. Relax and let go of the things you cannot change, and work on the things that you can and want to change.

So I suppose all of this boils down to giant bowl of clichés; “Life is never promised. Tomorrow is never promised. So if you could do anything you wanted to do, you should really just go out and do it and stop thinking about it before life is really over. Don’t go through life saying “I should have,” or “I could have,” Go through it saying “I did,” or “I tried.” Do one thing a day that scares you, and if your goals and dreams don’t scare you, they just aren’t big enough.

Breathe a little more, allow the everyday stress to subside a little more frequently, enjoy life a lot more. You know? I’m 30. I don’t have any regrets. I really don’t. I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything. I don’t feel like I AM missing out on anything. I feel as though life moves at a rapid pace, even when it feels like it isn’t moving at all. So be greater, do better, live fuller. Throw out the rules, and live by the map of your own dreams. I mean really. I could make a lot of money if I went and sat at a desk somewhere, but my life would be meaningless and unfulfilling because that just doesn’t fit me or my personality. So I find myself extra grateful for the people in my life who support me (both financially and emotionally) in my dreams, my career or ‘hobby’ of choice.

Big change is happening. I’m excited. Always give a little more love, be a little more compassionate and smile often because you have no idea what’s really happening in the lives of those who surround you. Less judgment, Especially tonight, it’s a full moon, the crazies are out and this is going to definitely last another 3-4 days, so hold on. And love them anyway.

Big Love! Big Change! Be Big. And HOLD ON!
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